Well I have made it to August. I am here. A lot of guys have been telling me that I am at a good locking length. I was hearing the chatter as early as 3 weeks ago. So I am especially excited about being able to move to the next phase of this journey. I have been thinking a lot about people’s perception and my response to them. I think over all the worldly views is one that I am thinking of. I sometimes feel the pressure that I have to conform into what ‘you’ expect me to look like based on what ‘you’ are used to when it comes to me. That type of thinking has to stop. I have to be me the way that I see me and not allow other people opinions weigh in.
I guess stepping into the unknown makes me a little shifty. I want to be accepted for my differences but more importantly I want to be me. I want to be free in a sense and able to experience life on my terms. Changing my appearance and opening my mind to more things that are going on around me will give me the freedom that I covet. For some no depth of thought was required or a lapse in their decison to assume such a journey in the first place. Well for me, those issues do exist. I have a deeper reason for going down this path as well as lapses in why I deccided to pursue such an ethnic look. I am a thinker. I am a writer. When most people glaze over issues, and not have the patience to consider the facts I tend to have a more thoughtful perspective. Locking my hair is no different animal. I think deeply about it and feel i need to understand the spirit in me that yearns for this way of being. So ultimately locking my hair is a growth and transition of myself from one phase to another. A self induced paradigm shift of discovery and reinvention of ones self.